Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Melt Down - C1W8D2


I soooo wish I was posting about fat melting off my body. Nope. I had a doctor’s appointment first thing this morning and of course, they always weigh you… I’m UP 5 lbs. I weigh more today than I did in early June well before I started my current BFL challenge. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME?????????

Needless to say, I broke into tears. I just don’t understand. I’m so sad. I just want to succeed at this. I want to wear shorts when we go back to Malaysia in less than seven weeks. It’s so flippin hot and humid there. I don’t want to wear jeans and pants all the time. I don’t want to be FAT ANYMORE. I know in my heart I’m giving it my everything. I’ve never been so focused about a program like I am with BFL.

Why is this not working for me? I used to only eat about twice a day and when I did eat it was taco bell or lean cuisine or scones for gawd’s sake. Now I’m doing everything I’m supposed to do. I might be getting too many calories though. How many am I supposed to get???? Fuck. I don’t know anything right now. Analysis Paralysis.

I’m a real Debbie Downer today. Wah wah.

Plan of Attack:
I started keeping track of my food at fitday. My doctor asked me how many calories I’m getting in and I told him about 1500 and he said that’s too much. I need to decrease my calories if I’m going to lose weight. OK fine. I just did some detailed research and according to Hussman, I need to decrease my calories to about 1100 calories per day to lose fat without losing muscle. That’s what I’ll do. I guess I should’ve done this research earlier.

So, today I did HIIT on the elliptical followed up with 15 minutes on the stationary bike. Did I achieve a true “10”?… I think the answer is “no” because if you’re not sure if you hit a 10, you probably didn’t – right? But I was dripping sweat and it did feel like a good workout. I gotta find my groove.

Meals:
M1 – oatmeal and protein, 1 tbsp PB (I’ve gotta finish this jar and NEVER buy it again or just throw it away!)
M2 – protein shake and small gala apple
M3 – oatmeal and protein
M4 – tuna fish (no carb to cut back on calories)
M5 – 3 oz. of chicken breast, small apple
One gallon of water.

Thanks to all of you for your wonderful encouragement, support, and tips.

Update:
Hmmm… I just now got a call from my doctor’s office. My lab work shows my TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) levels are back up in the "no longer normal" range. That means my hypothryroid is still affecting my weight loss efforts in a very negative way. The only way I can lose weight is if my levels are in the normal range – so he’s probably going to increase my medication. I guess that’s good news. At least it helps explain why I’m not seeing weight loss. That and I was getting too many calories in…

6 Comments:

At 5:17 PM, Blogger Wolfie said...

Sorry it's hitting you today. I've been going through the same emotions this week, but only because I HAVEN'T been doing everything right this week! I've been sticking between 1100-1200 calories. Started with 20%fat, 40%carbs and 40% protein. Switched it to 20%fat, 30%carbs and 50% protein. I found that my body likes to hang onto those carbs, so I switched it up a bit. Also...make sure your saturated fat does not go above 10% a day. You can pm me if you need any more....THIS part I've gotten down! Chin up..you'll find your groove!

 
At 6:35 PM, Blogger KC said...

I hate this weight thing, you know? So, weight can fluctuate 5 pounds here and there, especially for women with all our hormones and water and whatever else the hell is the matter with us. And time of day makes a difference, as well as a bunch of other stuff.

The other day, I weighed myself, and I lost 4 lbs! Cool, right? What you want? Well, let me tell you that it was the morning after I skipped dinner AND my last snack. So, yeah, my weight went down, but that is the WRONG way to do it. I probably lost muscle and water, too, not just fat. That number on the scale is WAAYY overrated.

Chin up girlie. I was already worried that you're not getting enough calories based on your previous post which describes a menu of eggs, tuna, and oatmeal. I hope your doc is right regarding your calorie intake.

 
At 6:35 PM, Blogger KC said...

oh, and love the Debbie Downer photo. Hahaha. I feel like that daily!

 
At 7:56 PM, Blogger Wolfie said...

Rachel

I wanted to add here. I took another look at your profile, and I want to point out that you said you didn't know where you wanted your scale weight to be. At your height, your current weight is good! Take a look at your measurements again. Look at how many inches you have lost! 2 1/2 inches off your waist, 1/2 inch off your thighs and a loss of 4% bodyfat in just 8 weeks! What does that tell you? You are also probably still retaining water. I know, I know...you KNOW that, but it's still ugly to see it on the scale! When you get frustrated, just please...go back and review everything you started with, and you'll see that you are making good progress. I'm here for you whenever you need...

 
At 2:19 PM, Blogger Rachel said...

Thank you all sooooooo much for your encouragement. I’ve taken a serious look at my nutrition and have decided to make some adjustments – not solely based on my doctor’s advice, but based on Hussman’s information as well. I’m tracking every morsel at fitday. Yesterday’s calories totaled 1,113 and I definitely feel some hunger pangs, but I’ll get used to it. I’m going to try to keep calories between 1100 and 1250. We’ll see how this works. I was concerned about lowering my calories too much because the last thing I need is my metabolism slowing down any more than it already is, but based on my research, I don’t think my daily goal will adversely affect me.

I’ve decided to call this challenge a bulking challenge since I’ve built some awesome muscle – wish I could let the whole world feel my quads, calves, and biceps! And as soon as my thyroid is optimized, I’ll be able to lean out. Burn baby Burn!!

Yes, I am encouraged by the news that my thyroid isn’t functioning properly because it does help me understand that my hard work isn’t paying off for a very good reason. I just have to stay calm and keep truckin’. My health problems are so superficial compared to what other people have gone through and go through. Love you guys – you’re AWESOME!

 
At 8:35 PM, Blogger Mari said...

Keep truckin great attitude keep it up and you will be losing weight like crazy.

 

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